Wednesday 24 July 2013

Shit DJ Booths And Fucked Up Equipment



It's been a while, but I'm back...

Thanks to everyone who's been reading the posts, and thanks to all the £50 DJs who got offended by the last few posts.. I hope it's made you realise that you're all dumb fucks.

Anyways, here's another aspect of DJ-ing that really pisses me off - nightclubs that have impractical DJ booths, dirty DJ booths, and the worst of all...DJ booths with broken/missing/unserviced equipment.

I've lost count of the number of clubs I've played at where the mixer is sticky from someone dropping Vodka and Redbull on it, the turntables don't work where they have not been serviced since about 1999, the cue buttons on the CDJs don't work because again, some twat spilt his drink over them whilst most probably fist pumping to "Don't You Worry Child" or fucking "Levels".

If that's not enough, we have to work with mixers that are missing crossfaders and knobs, limited space to place our laptops and Serato boxes....sometimes we even have to work with CDJs which are missing phono cables. The smarter DJs roll with extra cables anyway, but still...it's frustrating.

Venues don't seem to understand that if your equipment is substandard, the performance of your DJ will also be substandard. Granted, us experienced DJs can make do with what we're given and rock a crowd, but it can be hard when you're missing a crossfader and you're having to use instant doubles because only one deck is working.

Bottom line is that DJs are human and will inevitably make mistakes. Drinks will get dropped occasionally, fader knobs will pop off (and get stolen), and crossfaders will break.

Venues please learn that equipment will not last forever. It will last a longer though, if you look after your decks and mixer(s) by servicing them regularly, replacing missing/broken items, and by building a practical DJ booth where no one can easily spill drinks over the equipment...

Next time I'll be ranting about DJs who play anything and everything to get a booking... There simply aren't enough specialists anymore.

Take care, and remember not accept £50 for a five hour booking.